The '76 version, believe it or not, wins over the '33 and the '06
Why should I, I said, and become just another rat in the pack, that adjective-scrounging, celebrity-sniffing species known as the modern film critic? "Film critic" - how kind. That occupation went the way of the blacksmith and the shoetree maker, right after Pauline Kael died (sorry, David Thomson.) Entertainment writers, that's what they are, Pavlovianly oohing and ahhing over every shiny new, multi-million dollar object, the latest being - am I really on the verge of committing these two sickeningly familiar words to print? - King Kong.
But I must. Must! If only to contribute the last remaining angle on the story: the indisputable superiority of - and yes, I'm damn serious - the '76 version.
I know: I'm the Classic Film guy. I'm supposed to praise Kong The First to heavens higher than those the planes that took him down him populated. But having just watched all three versions back to back to back, I'm sorry, I am forced, no question!, to violate the dictates of my posting.
It took an ape-foot sized kicking at the time (still does today), but the '76 version stands tallest in every major area - technology excepted. The story, steeped in the '70's mania for realism and topicality, is infinitely more plausible: the whole adventure isn't launched on some deluded filmmaker's whim, it's prompted by a search to restock America's depleted oil supply (it would have played, in fact, just as well today.) The human story, the crucial dimension where the other versions fall down worse than Kong himself, features multi-dimensional characters, swallowable dialogue, and the best character actors of the era: Jeff Bridges, Charles Grodin, and in her debut, Jessica Lange (who played the dumb blonde so convincingly, critics, unaware that a great actress lurked inside, mistook her for some silly supermodel unable to deliver.) And the pace! The pace! No interminable waiting around for the star of the show, like waking up on Christmas morning only to be told to sit tight for another few hours.
...There! I have just wrangled free from my deluded captors, and, having read what they've written, am back at my post to assure you, as you have reasonably expected, that the RKO version is the A-O.K. one!
Tempting as that would be as a way to end this article, I can't do it. I'm sticking to these guns like Jessica Lange to a prop paw.
Disco-Kong beats Techno-Kong, even Grandpa -Grand paw? - Kong
